Letting go is difficult for me. I tend to hold on to things and people when I know I shouldn’t. Sometimes it’s out of guilt. Other times it’s because of fear of being judged or uncertainty. Nevertheless, allowing things to shift and drift in life is not always an easy task. I don’t think it’s supposed to be because lessons matter and hold weight. While on this journey of removing, adjusting, and shifting, I’ve found that minimalism is teaching me to let go of things. Things are easy to throw away or give to charity, but my heart is still having trouble letting go of people.
Analysing this can be tricky because as an advocate for self-care and self-preservation, holding on to others to spare feelings isn’t healthy and can cause personal suffering. This is where letting go for me gets hard. I do not like hurting people’s feelings, especially if I care about them, but I also refuse to suffer. So, balance is another lesson here that I try to learn on a daily basis. What’s been coming in my prayers lately is “everyone can’t hold the space of closeness.” For those of you also struggling with the let-go-blues too, allow me to offer you (and myself) this gentle reminder: Letting go doesn’t mean you don’t care. Sometimes it means, not right now (or even) not ever, and that is okay.
Letting go often comes with the feeling of losing or missing out. Yes, not having access to something (or someone) forever is daunting. When it comes to shifting away from certain relationships, it literally makes my skin crawl to cut ties. My anxiety soars through the roof, and I tend to feel incredibly guilty. I much rather have a relationship naturally drift apart than having to be confrontational. I’ve gotten into this not so good habit of cutting ties in silence.
Personally for me, having a fulfilled life requires boundaries. I am steadily learning to honour my boundaries all across the board; in my marriage, family, friendships and career. If I choose to loosen my grip on something or someone, it’s for a reason, and I need to respect myself (and the other party) enough to acknowledge those reasons. My biggest lesson in all of this is that letting go doesn’t have to be tumultuous, dramatic, or come with the feeling of loss. Sometimes it’s serving a bigger purpose, opening other doors, creating room for growth and redemption.
You owe yourself the chance to experience something new.
Holding on to people, places and things out of comfort or worry will dim the light of your soul.
Be brave and bold enough to loosen your grip, open your heart, and take care of yourself in a way that can ultimately translate into pouring goodness into the world, your relationships, and life walk.
You’re not the only one on this path of love, loss, and learning.
Have a blessed day