Before you believe anything anyone has to say, look for 3 things: knowledge, experience and results.
If a person’s never successfully done something – or at least helped someone else do it – their opinion has no value and can be ignored.
Stop taking relationship advice from the friend who last had a partner in 2004. Stop listening to the freak athlete who tells you that ice cream never made anyone fat.
Unless someone’s been where you’ve been and has what you want, take everything they say with a grain of salt.
Two Types Of People You Should Never Listen To:
Most of the time, other people don’t want you to succeed.
Here are the main points:
I’m not saying the world is full of hostile people who want you to screw up out of malice. But even a loving parent can hold their child back from moving out and becoming independent for fear of losing them. It’s human nature. So when someone gives you advice, don’t automatically assume it’s good-natured. Unless it’s positive and constructive, chances are that the person giving it is a hater. (Not in the sense that they hate you but in the sense that they’d hate to see you succeed – for whatever reason).
Buying into what haters have to say will make you doubt yourself and screw with your self-esteem. So while it’s always good to get a second opinion, be very careful about taking advice – other people usually want you to fail.
The Emotional Adviser
The last kind of person you should always ignore is the emotional adviser: the person who gives advice based on emotion and personal experience instead of logic.
One example is the heartbroken friend telling you that all guys are cheaters etc. Another example is when a girl who’s always struggled to lose weight says that “some people are just meant to be fat”.
If you want to do something out of the ordinary with your life, expect to get a lot of emotional advice. I know I did when I decided to take time off to travel. A lot of it was from my then-friends. The idea that I would not be paid for three months was so crazy to them that they didn’t see how I’d make it work. Although I already had savings and a supportive Babi, they kept nudging me not to do it.
Look – at the end of the day, it doesn’t matter how anyone else feels. You’re you and if you feel good about a decision, that’s the only thing that matters. So learn to ignore emotional advice and always do what you feel is right.
The hater and the emotional adviser: 2 types of people whose opinion you should always ignore.
The funny thing is, these people often genuinely want to help you with their advice. But since they lack experience, good intentions and objectivity – in that order – nothing they say can really help you.
So learn to separate good advice from bad and always trust your heart.