To my 79-year-old husband,
I have planted a seed in you that I have watched grow over the last 50 years.
There have been times when I didn’t think we would make it this far but by God’s grace, we are here. We are here together. Not even sure how because I know the devil did not want this. But he forgot that our God, yes our God, is all-powerful.
Thank you for loving me all these years even when I didn’t know how to love you the way you deserved to be loved.
Thank you for being the father of our children. Nazareth is so fortunate to have a strong black man to look up to as a father. I remember being twenty-seven, scared that my children will face the same fate I did, but you worked hard to give them everything that my father didn’t give me and then some.
What did I ever do in this life to be blessed with such a man like this?
It can only be God.
We have travelled all over the world. Seen many places, been fortunate to live lives that some people can only dream of. Who would have thought, you being a poet and me being a writer would have afforded us such opportunities.
I say this because we struggled for a long time. We didn’t have the security of a monthly paycheck, didn’t have the house we wanted when we wanted or the car we needed to get from city to city. We fought many demons and dealt with so many things, I know our parents tried saving us from before we got married. On the outside, we lacked but on the inside, God gave us the intangible things people strive for their entire lives.
It’s funny though because I still remember our wedding day like it was yesterday.
We were so young man but thought we knew it all and did things our way.
You wore that purple suit which I made you threw out a few years ago because it didn’t fit you anymore.
I regret doing that by the way. Even though at the time I didn’t say this. Pride got in the way when it shouldn’t have. I am sorry.
I am also sorry for not believing in myself all the times I should have. You have always told me that I was a great, powerful woman and I wish I believed you when you said it that day in Brixton Nandos in 2010. But I am glad I know this now and have known this for the last fifty-five years. Thank you, Babi.
The millions of lives you have impacted in the same way, you will never know, but deep down I hope you do. I hope you know that you have done everything that God put you on this earth to do.
You fulfilled your purpose Babi
You are great and I am so glad to have had a front row seat to your life. To our life.
All those sacrifices were worth it.
I told you so (a phrase you stopped allowing me to use for such a long time but thought I could get away with it this time, because I am your Babi).
Love your forever slaying 79 years old wife.
P.s thank you for encouraging me to release my book, I Quit, all those years ago, it was so hard being that vulnerable and honest, but doing that made me the woman I am today.